happy couple registering for wedding gifts

Photo Credit: Carina Skrobecki

Today’s super helpful guest post comes to us from Lizzy Ellingson of Blueprint Registry. Enjoy!

For generations past, allowing guests to randomly choose wedding gifts was a risky business. After all, who needs more than one fondue set or blender? Who really trusts their relatives to pick items which match their taste and style? Millennials are breaking trends, and are not only doing most of their wedding registry activity online, it is also becoming more commonplace to ask for cash gifts to help with the honeymoon or for a down-payment on a home.

Read the full post after the cut!

We see 70% of couples ask for at least one cash gift from their guests, be it to help with plane tickets or new patio furniture for their house. However, while cash gifts are the norm in other cultures from Greece to India to China, asking for money as a wedding gift remains somewhat of a faux pas in western culture. Here are some tips on how newlyweds can subtly encourage guests to contribute financially, without ruffling any feathers:

pretty champagne cocktails

Photo Credit: Carina Skrobecki

1. Register For Both Cash and Physical Gifts

Although many couples register for just a honeymoon fund or cash gifts. There will always be some guests, like close relatives, that want to gift you something tangible. People enjoy buying presents and take pride in gifting something personal, which they feel represents their relationship with you. For example, your active uncle might want to buy you an outdoor experience, or something which will remind you both of him.

A great way to make asking for cash gifts socially acceptable is to add a few physical products to your register that you really want or need as well as a cash gift. By seamlessly combining physical and cash gifts, you give gifter the optionality to purchase a gift which they feel comfortable with. And it means you get a few cool presents out of the wedding too!

dollar bill

Photo Credit: NeONBRAND

2. Ask Tactfully or Write a Poem

In the US, giving money as a wedding gift has commonly been viewed as too impersonal for such an important life event. However, with the 2016 American Wedding Study shows couples are spending more of their own funds on their wedding, and many newlyweds are asking for cash to give them a financial leg up as they begin their new chapter together.

However, like pretty much any time you ask anyone for money, be it your parents or a friend, it’s important to be tactful. Simply writing “No gifts, Only $$$” may come off as a bit crass. Many couples are choosing to craft subtle poetry on their wedding invitations, which hint that they would prefer a financial contribution but still leaving the door open for other gifts too.

A recent article in The Guardian offers various examples of cute poems couples can use to express their wishes in a more personal manner, such as “If you were thinking of giving a gift to help us on our way / the gift of money in a card would really make our day!” Another great example is “if you can’t choose a gift don’t fear, you can give us cash to spend on beer”.

wedding rings on a globe

Photo Credit: Carina Skrobecki

3. Crowdfund for Something Bigger

While some guests may feel uncomfortable just sending over cash with no idea as to what you will spend it on, another option is to crowdfund for something big which is really important to you both. Rather than receiving lots of smaller gifts, this could be an extension of your house or a dream cruise to the Caribbean!

A great idea is to allow individuals to contribute to different parts of the trip, project or experience. This means that a guest gets the gratification of knowing that a particular gift came specifically from them.

When you register for cash gifts, be as descriptive of the uses as possible. For example, requesting “Beach Cocktails” or “Scooter Rental” seems more personal than a general “Honeymoon Fund”. When people feel that they are part of something, and help you reach a particular goal, they might be more comfortable contributing financially.

For those new to the honeymoon registry, you can ask guests can donate cash to cover the price of a honeymoon in general, or ask for gift cash that covers something specific, like an upgrade to a luxury suite for a night or a horseback riding along the beach . The options vary depending on the destination you choose. Or if you aren’t the traveling type, you can create a home downpayment fund or create cash group gifts for expensive tangible products like season tickets to your favorite sports team, a BBQ grill, or DSLR camera.

It’s your big day, and you should be able to get what you really want. Creating a universal registry allows you to customize gifts to you and your partner’s styles and personalities. However, follow these three tactics to get what you really want, without offending the more traditional amongst your friends and family.

online wedding registry

Lizzy Ellingson is chief creative officer and co-founder of Blueprint Registry, a unique registry website that let users combine their registries from top retailers, ask for cash, and personalize their experience for weddings, babies, new homes and graduations. To learn more about Blueprint Registry, please visit their website.