Today’s fun guest post comes to us from Maddison Wallace of Paperlust! Enjoy:
In 2017, for better or worse, wedding planning revolves around the internet. From dreaming up your day on Pinterest, reading wedding blogs for advice, shopping for wedding invitations online or finding the perfect venue, it’s hard to know where you would even begin without it! In previous generations, of course, no such thing existed, so bridal magazines, books and help from family and friends were necessary. In 1942 a book titled ‘Your Wedding: How to Plan and Enjoy It’ was published in America. The author, Marjorie Binford Woods, was the editor of Modern Bride Magazine and gave advice about every aspect of wedding planning, including the bridal shower. The book was a huge success, with revised editions and fresh print runs right into the 1980s. So how did some of that advice age?
Read the full post after the cut!
“After each shower, be sure to send a thank-you note to your hostess and personal notes to all gift-givers”
This advice is timeless: gratitude never goes out of style! Whoever hosts your bridal shower or helps out with the event, remember to write them an appreciative note and perhaps give them a gift. Keep track of gifts you receive on the day and send appropriate personalized thank you notes afterward.
“It’s delightful to have lots of showers and other fun doings, but too many festive events can wear everyone out, including you.”
This is truer now than ever. It’s become far less common to have multiple bridal showers, with most brides opting for one large one or a couple of small ones (usually one for family, one for friends, or one shower and one hens party). Having too many pre-wedding events is expensive, time-consuming, and can appear showy or excessive. It also takes your planning energy away from the wedding and can make the big day a little less exciting when it finally rolls around. Stick to one or two events to celebrate your impending marriage unless there is a good reason to have more.
“The bridegroom’s immediate family or yours should never give showers.”
This piece of etiquette is a little old-fashioned for 2017. Whoever has the desire and ability to throw your bridal shower is the right person for the job. You should be considerate about who you ask – make sure they feel comfortable to say no if they don’t want to do it! – but there’s no reason your sister or your mother in law shouldn’t be allowed to host the event if they’re genuinely happy to do it.
“You may entertain your attendants more simply at an afternoon tea or trousseau affair where they can have a look at your new wardrobe.”
There is some good in this advice: a low-key afternoon tea or similar event can be a great simple alternative to a fancy bridal shower. Unfortunately, most of us aren’t getting a whole new wardrobe of clothes just because we’re going to be a married lady (but hey, maybe we should bring that back!) so there’s not going to be a whole lot of entertainment at your party if that’s the plan.
“A farewell luncheon for your bridal party is a traditional part of the festivities of a big formal wedding. It is sometimes called ‘the spinster luncheon’ (or dinner).”
There’s nothing wrong with a lunch or dinner with the girls as part of your bridal festivities, but please never ever refer to that as ‘the spinster luncheon’. Just avoid that term altogether, please. I’m sure it’s obvious why: you’re getting married. Please don’t call your friends ‘spinsters’. Just don’t.
While much of this advice has aged surprisingly well, it’s quite a relief that we can now rely on the internet to answer all our wedding planning questions.
Maddison is head of content at Paperlust. She is a communications professional, postgrad student, part-time librarian, and occasional wedding photographer. She loves words and drinking cups of tea. To learn more about Paperlust, please visit their WeddingLovely Vendor Guide profile.