Today’s insightful guest post about things happy couples do differently, brought to us by dating advisor Sarah Williams, is full of super practical suggestions for nurturing a happy relationship! Enjoy:
When in a couple, your whole world changes. For some, it’s quite the struggle. They feel obligated to make compromises, feel like they are missing out on a lot now that they have someone to share everything with, and often keep things to themselves, or try to guess what their partner isn’t telling them.
But there’s the other type of couples too. It’s where balance is over everything else. The 2 people are grateful to have found each other and nothing else matters. They are smiling and laughing most of the time, and don’t pay much attention to the issues that come up every now and then that have the potential to turn into arguments.
So, what’s their secret? We’d all want to be more like them. To feel blessed when in a couple, rather than as if we’re settling down. Well, there are a few things happy couples do differently than the rest. Let’s see what these are, why they work, and how we can try them in our relationship:
Read the full post after the cut!
1. Honesty Directs Communication
Once you start hiding things, making hints and trying to be understood without saying what’s on your mind and clearly stating what you expect from the relationship, things go bad. In fact, poor communication is the main reason why couples break up. So, if you want to strengthen your bond, or even fix it and make sure it lasts, turn to honesty. Leave behind all assumptions, and ask when you think something isn’t as it should be. And when you have something to share, do it right away. As bad as it might sound in your head, it’s much better when it’s out of there and into the real world.
2. They Form Healthy Relationship Habits
Success in any area of life is a result of good habits. When you want to be doing better at work, you start arriving earlier, get more organized, take up new projects, become initiative at meetings, boost your energy from the morning on, etc. When you want to fix your financial situation, you change your shopping habits, start saving, become mindful about your budget, and more. And what new successful habits do we form once we’re in a couple?
Most people don’t consider that such a transformation and keep doing what they’ve always been doing. And that’s what they do wrong. The healthy relationship practices I’m talking about could be anything from making one compliment a day, going out for dinner every 2 weeks, watching a movie together in the evening a few times a week, working out together, talking about what you’re gonna accomplish during the day over breakfast, bringing your future spouse coffee in bed when you wake up earlier, sending funny messages and pictures to each other from work, going on a Sunday walk together, etc. These are the things happy couples do differently. All these become the foundation of what you two have and make it special. What’s more, such rituals help you bond and keep all this for as long as you wish.
3. Don’t Criticize
I know some people who’ve been together for quite some time, but even being around them makes me leave in a worse mood than before. That’s because of the criticism. Usually it’s one of them constantly pointing out what the other is doing wrong, reminding them of something similar in the past, and concluding how it will happen again. That crushes their partner’s self-esteem, leads to arguments and hurt feelings, and might be a relationship killer over time. Don’t do that. If you already are, break the habit. Start small, be mindful of everything you say to your loved one. And make sure you’re sending positive vibes only.
4. They Grow Together
To be in a couple isn’t the end of your personal, spiritual and career development. In fact, it could be exactly the opposite. Having someone beside you to encourage you in your endeavors, to help you out when needed, to believe in you even when your goals are impossible, to remind you to get up early and eat your proteins if you want to get in shape, or else, is all we need to thrive. Things happy couples do differently is not only continuing their personal growth journey but once together, they speed it up.
5. They Accept Each Others’ Flaws
When entering somebody’s life and becoming their most important person, you’re welcoming all that they have, together with their aspirations, regrets, bad habits, and flaws. If you don’t really think about it in the beginning, but then notice each of these, get annoyed, and start thinking of ways to change him or her, you’ll most likely end up on bad terms. Instead, embracing acceptance is just one of things happy couples do differently. That means choosing your partner in every possible way, and loving him for who he is and the qualities he has. That will make everything so much easier. You won’t expect much, but when he does something good you’ll be pleasantly surprised.You both will be at ease, the communication will be smooth, there will be harmony at home, and no one would burden the other one with high expectations or dissatisfaction.
6. They Keep The Excitement
Another great thing happy couples do differently is not just to be positive, to smile often, to laugh at each others’ jokes, but also to be excited about one another. Be it about good news your partner brings, something you experience, a new goal one of you sets, new opportunities that come which might turn into something big, your next trip, a celebration, or else. Study shows reacting with positivity to each others’ news and even the little things from daily life is key to keeping your relationship strong. So, the next time your loved one comes back from work, or even calls during the day, be truly excited about it. It will make him happier too.
7. They Do Things For Each Other
Last but not least, the happiest partners that I’ve seen are the ones who show respect and love to each other on a daily basis, and using small acts of kindness when least expected, and without wanting anything in return. Things happy couples do differently is often make dinner for each other, the man might bring flowers every now and then, it could be cleaning the house even though it wasn’t your turn, or buying a little something without an occasion. Whatever it is, the little things become the big ones over time. So don’t skip that part of being in a couple.
What other things do you do differently in your relationship?
Sarah Williams is a full time blogger and dating advisor. Her mission is to help people to date better and find true love, so they don’t fall into the same traps that she did. In her free time, she loves to observe human interactions. Sarah believes we can take a lesson from every encounter.